How to Know When Your Calling Might be Calling You

There was a famous novel written in 1886 called The Death of Ivan Ilyich.

It was widely considered to be one of the best novels ever written telling the story of Ivan, a high-court judge in 19th-century Russia who was diagnosed with a terminal illness.

Ivan is an “intelligent, polished, lively, and agreeable man” who spends the majority of his life climbing social ladders and immersing himself in his work, often at the expense of his marriage and family.

Then one day, after an awkward fall while doing household chores, he begins experiencing a relentless pain in his side. The pain becomes so intolerable that he decides to visit a doctor wherein he tragically learns that he has a terminal illness. Confronted with his diagnosis, he attempts every remedy he can to cure his worsening situation, until eventually, the pain becomes so intense that he is forced to stop working and spend the remainder of his days in bed.

While bed-ridden and dying, he begins to traverse the stages of grief including denial, anger, bargaining, and depression. He starts to question for the fist time whether he has, in fact, lived a good life, asking himself questions like:

• What is my life really about?
• What have I been living for?
• What is my life in service to?

In his final days, he discovers what makes an artificial versus an authentic life. He learns compassion and empathy and dies having known and lived the true meaning of his life.

This story is a beautiful metaphor for our own lives.

Beyond our titles, work, achievements, and status, what is the true appointment of our soul?

Your calling might be calling you if you feel that pain in your side. The pain that just won’t go away. It’s that nagging-keep-you-up-at-night-always-there pain.

Have you felt it?

I certainly have.

I think many are feeling that pain now and are waking up to the appointment of their soul. This has given way to the Great Resignation, or what could be called, the Great Search for Meaning.

Many of us are asking ourselves, how much of my life has been lived on autopilot? What am I in service to? What is truly worthy of investing my time and energy into?

Meaning is always trying to find us. We don’t create meaning, we live it, or we run from it.

When we run from it, we run into problems. Symptoms.

If you have been feeling the metaphoric pain in your side and wondering what it is next, start with these questions:

• What is wanting expression through me?
• What is true for me?
• What is one thing that has been constant throughout my life?
• What is something that I’ve always valued?
• In what ways can I be of service?
• What is something that gives me purpose and a mysterious connection to something larger?

Begin anew by starting small. Know that your calling may not be your vocation or what supports you financially. Of course it can be, but this isn’t always the case. Be open. Stay curious. Try new things and be willing to fail. Learn about what it is that feeds your soul and spirit. Discover what gives you purpose and direction. Find out which subjects speak to you and why. Soon you will uncover what wants to pour forth, what wants to be expressed through you.

You will sense an inner satisfaction and knowing when you are on the right track. Something will feel reciprocal. There will be an inner sense of meaning, of knowing, and then you’re on your way.

If you are interested in this topic, I highly recommend the work of James Hollis, a Jungian Analyst and author. He is the reason I know this story and is a wonderful example of someone who truly found meaning in his life.